Dodgeball Season Has Commenced

That's all I have to say right now... That, and GO EL DIABLO!!!

I'm seriously disappointed with the direction Fox Pictures has gone with its Alien and Predator (and Alien vs Predator) series.

Ripley being born through a test tube and genetically altered into a hybrid human/xenomorph? Seriously.

Danny Glover having an easier time killing a predator than Arnold Schwarzenegger? Seriously.

GET TO THE CHOPPA!

Alien vs Predator? I mean, come on. The xenomorph may have razor sharp teeth and claws, and is highly agile. But the predator is a highly intelligent, technologically advanced being with superb killer instinct. And 2 of them die in the first fight scene - by the SAME ALIEN! Seriously, Fox. Seriously.

On that note, watch the movies (except alien vs predator (pure rubbish)). Seriously, the age-old forbidden love romance movies are getting old. They're so cliché, so american. I say we go back to the good ol' days of cheesy monster action flicks. I love cheering for the monsters! ;p

ABC

In other news, I finally finished Anne Lamott's Bestseller, Travelling Mercies. I've been seriously wanting to read it for a while after hearing that it was the book that inspired Don Miller to write his book Blue Like Jazz (my favourite). In the end, I'd have to say that Blue Like Jazz is still my favourite, but Anne Lamott is a far better writer. I only prefer Don Miller's book because he's a guy and I can relate a whole lot more to his experience than Anne's. That being said, I highly recommend this book to any girl who struggles with her faith, appearance, weight, the opposite sex, etc. Ms. Lamott bares it all, and by the end of the book, she leaves you with a sense of peace. As if she's letting you know that if she can find grace, so can you. Drop me a line if you wanna borrow.

"... I've found that self-righteousness is very comforting. But Jesus is quite clear on this point. He does not mince words. He says you even have to love the whiners, the bullies, and the people who think they're better than you. And you have to stick up for the innocent." (250-51)

She writes a lot about her son and it's obvious how precious he is to her. Somewhere near the end she tells a story about the two of them snorkeling together. Way before this point, I've noticed that she has a lot of hang-ups with keeping her son safe and she muses and sighs over every decision, be it minute or grand, concerning her little Sam. My mind started to wander from the words even though my eyes were still on auto-pilot (as I always do, and then I have to read the page over again). And I began to imagine what it would be like to have a child of my own. A little mini-Neil running around. (S)He would mean the world to me. And then I thought about how much I must mean to my parents. I thought of my dad and how proud he must have been when I was a little kid. He would take me fishing every weekend and we'd keep the bass, perch, and pickeral; and throw away the catfish. How precious I must have been to him. And then I lost it. I couldn't breathe. In that epiphanic moment, I realize how much of a sorry-ass of a son I've been. They beckon me every night to spend a little time with them, but I shrug them and their stupid scrabble game off (seriously, I hate scrabble). All they really want is to spend time with me (why don't they ever play video games with me then?!). Today, I understand how fortunate I am to still have both my parents who still love each other very much and love me. And all I've done lately is take them for granted.

Anyway, yeah, I seriously recommend the book to all y'all girls in the house what! what! what! lawl.

Random facts:

uno. Number of times I've said 'seriously' in this post: 10 (if you count this line)

dos. Hardest paragraph for me to write was the last one. The screen kept getting blurry from my eyes welling up. ;p

tres. I want to meet a lady who's pretty on the outside and beautiful on the inside. Somebody like this. E-crush? Definitely. *le sigh*

Edit: I found this quote somewhere from some american whose identity I won't devulge to protect him from ridicule. All you need to know is that he's from Nevada...

“i was never a person to classify others into categories or titles but i guess you could call him my best friend. through the thick of it all we are able to withstand the 34 degrees for more than a few hours at a time, in the deepest greys of the night, fighting off the shivering and constant trembles in our voices that result from being out in the cold too long.”

Ok, 34 degrees. That's about 1 degree celsius. If you're from Winnipeg, you're thinking the exact same thing I'm thinking. THAT'S T-SHIRT AND SHORTS WEATHER! PUA HAHAHAHA!

Who did you vote for?

Election day today. Wanna know who I voted for? Well, here...



Ok, I didn't vote, I just made this up a long time ago during the previous election... Back when I thought I was funny.

I had to work today, so I didn't get a chance to go out and vote. But in all honesty, I really don't care about politics and I have serious doubts about our whole democratic system in general. Well, not in our system per se, but in the people that run our government. The way I look at it, there wasn't any good party to vote for. Each had their own leader who's a dumb old guy who's so out of touch with the country, and each had their own promises that they won't keep... And what's with all the smearing?! I can't believe people would vote for somebody who slandered the opposition. It's like voting for somebody who only focused on the problems and pointed fingers rather than figuring out solutions.

I feel that it won't matter who I vote for. Big deal, the conservatives won this time. We'll let them screw us around for 10 years or so until we change to liberal and they screw us around and so goes the cycle. I've never felt any loyalty to any particular party because none of them ever get around to what they say they'll do. So who really cares?

I am not without hope in our government, however. The first party to abolish taxes will win my support. Hopefully they're not the antichrist.

Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have unicorns to chase.

PACQUIAO IS TEH WINZ!!!

OMG x ∞
If you're brown, then you know exactly how I feel. For the rest of you whities, Pacquiao is only the most amazing Filipino boxer in the world! And he beat Morales in a rematch! So dramatic! I watched it with all my brown relatives and the house was just crazy when he knocked out Morales, not once, but TWICE!

It's like Philippines winning the super bowl! You have no idea how big this guy is. He's more celebrated in his home country than Bruce Lee/Jackie Chan ever were in China! It's like Philippines delivering a Flying Dragon Kick™ in the crotch to Mexico!

Take that! Elian can NOT stay!







Doesn't he look like Bahandi?

Close Encounters of the... Divine Kind

Last week, my friend Annie (the same Annie who sent me the dummy string) called me up and told me of a life-changing revelation she had. She had encountered God in a turning-point kind of way while on this conference of some sort. She was sketchy with the details of the whole thing and its secrecy led me to believe that it was some sort of fight club that nobody is supposed to talk about. In any case, she shared with me her revelation of the Almighty in a way that I wasn't prepared for, to say the least. I was at a loss for words after she had finished talking to the point where she might have thought I wasn't listening or didn't understand.

"I want to be a praying woman, because I never pray."

Those words were enough to tell me that somebody had doused gasoline on the small flame that was inside of her. A flame that had been burning at the end of its rope. I sensed a deep change within her from the tone of her voice almost as if I was talking to somebody I've never met before. Amidst her on-and-off weeping and murmering, she relayed the rest of her experience to me.

As I hung up, I was completely dumbfounded. It was a lot for me to digest. I began to reflect on my relationship with God. Where had I gone wrong? Have I gone wrong? Why doesn't God ever speak to me in such a way that would stir up passion within me? Where had my passion gone?

The truth is that I've been through those "Oh my God" moments before many times myself. It's hard to explain the feeling of utter exuberance from becoming a new person and seeing everything you've seen before in a different light. And yet those memories will be forever etched in my mind.

My thoughts then jumped to what Curtis (a Nav's staffer) told me during the Somewhere Else Retreat almost a year ago now. It had been right after one of those "Oh my God" moments where there was much crying and praying and empowerment. I had not gotten any dramatic revelation from the G-man that night and was kind of disappointed in the whole retreat considering it was our last night at the camp and the next day we were packing it all up to go home. Later that night, the session had long been over and most of us were in our bedtime attire already. It was a very non-chalant and yet intimate kind of setting as we sat in a circle of couches with a number of other guys.

"I don't experience those moments anymore... It's not that God doesn't speak to me in that way, it's just that I don't chase after it or fully give myself to that moment." Curtis declared.

After a very enlightening discussion, it felt as if God was tapping me on the shoulder, as if to tell me, "Neil, you're ok."

And after that night, I understood. Although I appreciate the moments of spiritual bliss, I realize that the darkest and most painful times of my life are where I've grown the most spiritually, as a person, and in character. God will reveal himself to us in the way he sees fit. It's true, some may never experience him in a dramatic way like Annie has, and yet just a hint of him is enough to spark a lifelong change in some people. Still others might need a kick in the butt to realize that he's there. I'll be the first to admit that I need a kick in the groin to be convinced of his presence.

Everybody's relationship with God is different. God has placed us all on different paths and some of our paths will intersect. Some will divide. Some may never cross. But in the end, I think the big guy has everything under control. Intuitively, I feel that all our paths will ultimately lead to some sort of revelation of his nature.

In no way am I saying that Annie's experience is totally bunk. I'm very glad for her because I had been praying for her for a long time that God would give her some sort of passion. And he's answered. But I think something can be learned from Curtis' example. Incidently, I thought Curtis was the most hilarious guy at the retreat... next to my fist.

"I'm not saying that I have this all together, that I have it made. But I am well on my way, reaching out for Christ, who has so wondrously reached out for me. Friends, don't get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all of this, but I've got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onward - to Jesus."
-Phil. 3:12-13

I want to hear from you. Where, if at all, have you experienced an "Oh my God" moment? Was there a catalyst in your relationship with Jesus? What has he taught you lately about your relationship with him? Whether you have or haven't, do you feel these moments are necessary (example)? Write as much as you like, but bear in mind that I prefer quality over quantity.

Anne Lamott said that the two best prayers she knows are "Help me, help me, help me." and "Thank you, thank you, thank you."

God, thank you for Annie. Help me to keep her fire burning.

Shameless Confession(s)

Edit:

"I still care... just that I don't have to be a part of his [or her] life to do that."

So true. Thanks for the reminder and encouragement, friend.

There's always heaven... =D

Those who have been with me since my xanga days may have noticed a steady decline in the frequency of my posts. I used to post a minimum of twice a week if not more, and they used to be funny. Lately, they've been more sombre and introspective. I'm sorry. And I realize that I've picked up a few more regular readers as well and I can only imagine the pain and sorrow they experience everytime they visit and find a blog that is barren of updates. And there's this one person in Dryden who keeps visiting... WHO ARE YOU?!? REVEAL YOURSELF!!!!!111one. Anyway, to thank all you who visit and read regularily, I promise to post at least once a week.* But, please... COMMENT! Thanks.

Random nothingness...

Last night I hung out with Jen and Jen. It was a summer staff reunion minus one staff member haha! We had a grand old time talking and catching up on things. The funniest part was that I called Jen earlier that day... and the conversation went like this:

"Hello?" she answered.
"Hi."
"Hi."
"Hi."
"How are you?"
"Hi."
"I was going to call you because Jen called earlier."
"Oh yeah? What did she say?"
"She said the tickets were already sold out."
"Yeah, that's why I was calling."
"Yeah she said we should meet up for supper anyway."
"Hmmm ok. Where are we meeting?"
"Dalat."
"What?"
"Dalat."
"What is that?"
"It's a chinese restaurant, it's on Ellice, I've been there before, it's pretty good."
"Yeah, but you're white, so it's probably not that good."
I called her from the Nav's office and the people listening in laughed. And then she laughed.
"So... are you going to pick me up?"

So we went to Dalat and it was a chinese/viet restaurant so I wasn't so disappointed. After that we went to Baked Expectations. It's the most amazing dessert place ever... next to my kitchen. ;p

The best part was at the end of the night, because I got to say:
"Good bye Jennifer. Good bye Jennifer."

Hmmm what else...

Oh, my friend Annie sent me these mittens with strings attached to them because I told her once that I keep losing my gloves and I need strings for them to put through my sleeves... And as soon as I got them, I immediately put them through my sleeves and practiced my nunchuk skills. i r s0 teh 1337.

My darkest secret. I love to randomly visit other people's sites and steal their images. Let me share some!




Yes, they're all girls. Got a problem? Don't mess.

*This promise is void.

Flashback #527

Have you ever had a Rolo pop? They're these popsicles with a solid chocolate shell filled with chocolate ice cream and caramel in the centre. I love them. They remind me of Québec. The first time I ever had a Rolo pop was with Karen, in Jonquière, QC, during a summer french language course.

I had graduated from high school with a french immersion diploma, and it was customary of our french teacher to send us on french orientated trips, kinda like a grad present. Karen was from Winnipeg too. For 2 of the 5 weeks of our stay in Québec, there was this rock festival going on. Every night we'd walk down the bar strip in town and at the end of the street was the stage where all the bands played. I felt so alive back then just taking in the sights of lanterns lined along the street, the sounds of chattering patrons on bar patios and great french music, and the smell of cigarette smoke and the river that was nearby. A biker gang was in full force in that town as they would ride up and down the street almost as a sign of arrogance towards the cops that were on patrol. The underage drinking was absurd. So many kids were sent home after their trip to the hospital. Each night, after the last band finished their session, Karen and I would go to this 50's style diner and have milkshakes together. Sometimes we would race to see who would finish theirs first, but normally we would talk about the meaning of life and what it's like to be in love.

"There's different kinds of love, Neil."

I disagreed at that time, but deep down I knew she was right.

Karen was catholic. She attended mass regularily, but it seemed more out of habit. She went to this big cathedral during her stay in Jonqière. It was one of those massive ancient stained-glass ones that you would see on postcards. I even accompanied her one Sunday. A beautiful building.

During my stay in Jonquière, I managed to start a bible study. There were a couple students from Nova Scotia who were christians and Rachel, my classmate, joined us as well. At our first meeting, we had Scott and Chelsea, Rachel, myself and April Griffin. April was the cutest girl you've ever met, I sat with her at least once a day in the cafeteria, and she'd always make a mess while eating. By the end she'd have this smear of chocolate on her cheek or ketchup all over her hands. She was always enthusiastic about everything. We got along well.

The next week, a few more people showed up at our little bible study, Karen was one of them. She seemed very interested about spiritual things. I suppose eternity is a seductive idea to most people who never really think about these things. Needless to say, she was hooked, and showed up every week thereafter.

The last week in Québec, I found out I was accepted into a leadership program in Calgary. I was so excited. The last night in Jonquière, we had this crazy farewell night that started off with watching a film the TA's made. It was little snippets of popular films all dubbed over with their voices. It was full of inside jokes about our course and I've never laughed so hard. After that, we got our little certificates and a small tribute to our teachers. There was a dinner and dance thing too. Crazy.

Karen had eventually found out I was going to Calgary in the fall instead of staying in Winnipeg where she was. At the end of the farewell night, she approached me with watery eyes...

"Neil, is it true you're going to Calgary?" She asked, as her lip quivered.

I smiled and grabbed her and held her as she sobbed on my shoulder. It was then that I knew that I had made a friend. A few weeks later while I was still in Winnipeg getting ready to move all my stuff, I got an email from Karen...

"Neil, thanks to you, I read my bible more often. I feel so much closer to God."

I felt so humbled that God had used me to touch somebody's life. I'll never forget that time at the dépanneur when Karen first introduced me to Rolo pops.

I love Rolo pops.

The MC* to the IP** in OE***, Fool.****

You know that Christmas feeling you get? When everything around you just fits? That feeling of being around people with the same spirit? That feeling of knowing you're free to be yourself?

Last week, I got my first Christmas feeling as I sat and sang in a house full of white people. Normally, I get my first Christmas feeling the day of as my family eats together and watches Christmas specials. But this year, I got that feeling just a little bit earlier as my church small group got together for a potluck. I am constantly amazed at God's providence in my life. Regardless of whether or not I know what's around the corner, He's in complete control. I'm like that petulant child in the backseat of the car complaining to the parent who's driving. Like it or not, I have to trust. Daddy knows best. Although I feel like I'm never content with my life, I can't complain because He has been good to me. And so there we were, sitting around the living room all stuffed with chicken wings and desserts galore. Jason pulled out the guitar and Nick brought his accordion along. It was quite hilarious as he tried to harmonize with Jason's out-of-tune guitar. We laughed and sang a variety of songs - some not even related to Christmas. As we tried to recall the lyrics to Boney M songs, I felt very much at home and perhaps... a small hint of His presence was made known to me. The smiling faces and laughter was far too much for me to regard these people as strangers. We have become family. And that's the best Christmas feeling you can have. I'm looking forward to spending the time off with my family and friends, namely, the 30 foot fools.

TTT

Through balmy wint'ry air doth we partake
With warmth of kin or chill of lonesome strife,
'Tis surely such a time we shan't forsake
To give our thanks to Thee who gave us life.

To all my friends I've made both old and new:
Forgive me for my slothfullness, I plead;
'Twas but my hermit nature I let through.
And yet I pine'd for life renew'd and freed.

Please know my heart and thoughts go with you all.
I pray to Thee, He'll bring you hope and joy.
For I, mere Neil, hath tasted, been enthral'd
By grace and mercy under Thine employ.

I sing redemption song for all to hear
That gratefulness is natural, the norm.
For liberation has thy price, 'tis clear;
My life is not my own, thus I perform.

For ev'ry morsel eaten and consume'd,
Remember those with nary a cent or thing.
'Cause we are bless'd to sleep inside a room,
Than face winter's harsh bite; avoid thy sting.

I seek perfection in my life, to soar.
A lofty goal, to reach the highest height.
And though I've fail'd, my peers have not kept score.
Accept my thanks, your hand in mine, don might.

TTT

Although it's been said
many times, many ways...

* M.C. = Merry Christmas
** I.P. = Iambic Pentameter
*** O.E. = Old English
**** Fool = You

Flashback #318

In many ways, he was my best friend at that time. I never actually admitted this to him, but he was the one I got along with most in elementary. Stefan, the magician. He was your veritable nerd complete with spectacles and ski-pants that everybody oh-so-loved to make fun of because he was different from everybody else. And at times, to my eternal shame, I joined in on the name-calling. During recess, we had formed an imaginary news crew called the "Dream Team" wherein we would approach other kids and ask them what they had dreamed last night. Normally it was about ponies, or ice cream. Every once in a while we'd get "I was president of Canada", or "I threw up pickles on my sister." I loved the irregular ones. It was the norm for "cool kids" in other classes to pick on Stef during recess. This one particular recess in grade 3, I was feeling awfully brave, and felt like picking a fight with one of Stefan's bullies as they were picking on him. I lost. My first and only schoolyard fight in my whole academic career, and I lost to a guy who was a foot taller than me. I lasted pretty long though, but a knee to the gut did me in. It was horrible and most memorable because the winner started to cry as the T.A.'s unleashed their fury on him. Even though I had proven my friendship with Stefan at that point, I still feel remorse to this day about all the times I had made fun of him along with the others, or the times I was embarrassed to be his friend. School is a jungle, what can I say?

In grade 3, he had won the most prestigious award of best magician of his age group in Canada (I didn't even know that there were championships). It was great, because nobody believed him except for me. Later that week, CBC wanted to do a news special on him and even record him doing a magic show in front of the whole class. Finally, some payoff to being his friend (selfish, I know).

In grade 4, his parents had divorced, and so at the beginning of summer, he had to move. It was a pretty sad time for me, but only as sad as a kid in grade 4 would lose a toy or forget where he buried his secret stash. After all, whom was I going to listen to Weird Al albums and go biking with now? I remember the day before he moved away, it was late afternoon. We biked together as the sun was setting. He promised to call me for special events like birthday parties and sleepovers. He didn't.

Filipinos have a strange culture. It's based very much on image. You can see it in today's youth as they drive their noisy ricemobiles whilst talking on their cellphone and seat reclined to the laying down position. The older generation care very much about their image as well, however, they show it in a different, and yet, very understandable fashion - through their children. The tradition of the debut started during the early spanish occupation of the Philippines and has been carried out among Filipino families ever since. So much in fact, that there was a movie made about it a few years ago. I loved it. I thought it was so funny, seeing as how the main character was a coconut, like me. ANYWAY, a debut is simply a celebration of a coming-of-age of a daughter in a Filipino family. I'm not sure if there are other cultures that celebrate this, but if there is, please let me know. =)

I'm sure you've been wondering ever since ricemobiles why I'm mentioning all this, and I will tell you. A bit more than a year ago, I met Stefan for the first time since he moved away at a debut. My neighbour's daughter had turned 18 that year. They also had a son, who had passed away at the age of six due to cancer. Stefan and I were friends with him during his short life, and yet neither of us knew about it until just before he had to move away. Apparently he had kept in touch with them and not me (FOR SHAME! Just kidding, I'm cool with it). So, as it turned out we were seated at the same table, his family and mine. His mom with her new husband, and his dad with his new wife, his twin sisters, who reminded me of the olsen twins, and his girlfriend, a pretty thing. My family came out strong with myself, Mom, and Dad. He looked a little different, hairier. And yet, he still held the same demeanor and mannerisms that were so familiar to me.

As we caught up, I learned that he had become a vegan, an athiest, and anarchist. He keeps a blog of his own. Now, I have no objections to his choice of worldview or lifestyle, I'm only saddened by how much we have grown apart. And though we both left that party on good terms, it seemed that we no longer had anything in common except for our childhood memories. I visit his blog every once in a while, and it's mostly about what he thinks of Bush, politics and ideals. Politics bore me, really, but I keep reading to see what I've been missing all these years. To see what his perspective on life is. I don't consider us friends anymore, but politics and opinions aside, I think that we could have still been friends had we kept in touch. In many respects, we are the same, him and I; we're both idealists. And even though this world isn't perfect, I believe that people can still get along regardless of race, religion, or beliefs. And I think this is as close to perfection as you can get. I certainly won't forget him.

I guess amidst all this rambling, what I'm trying to say is that experience has taught me that most people are in my life for a finite amount of time. It's kind of sad, but it's an ugly fact of life. On the flip side, my heart tells me that it doesn't have to be this way. That maybe, if both parties really wanted to make something happen, it would. I think I think too much.

Sidenote: A couple years after my first and only schoolyard fight, I beat the crap out of Michael Pinette, the biggest kid in our class because he started making fun of my last name. Ever since then, and throughout high school, he treated me like his best friend. Heh, Michael Peanut.

It's a Swirl!

Today, Year of our Lord, November 12, 2005, at 0316 hrs, my sister, Grace Midwinter, gave birth to a 7 lbs 3 oz girl. Her name is Cloe Ava Midwinter, and I'm her uncle. IN YO FACE, FOOL!

"Grace said it's your turn now, Neil." my mom told me.

"My turn?"

"To multiply."

Yeah, I'll get right on that. I think I need to take a few more steps before I can make babies, don't I?

Sometimes, I feel like this guy...

So I went to the big AIA thing tonight. Kinda got suckered into it. I really didn't want to go, but I felt that God was calling me to go, that He might have something to teach me. And boy, He sure did...

I'm really thankful that there are a handful of brave souls that are willing to stick their necks out and sell programs with some guy's testimony written in it and sell DVD's with his biography in it... but what about our testimonies? Our stories? I never told anybody this, but I didn't stop attending CCC because I was too busy, or even because of my other lame excuse that I'm too lazy to make new friends. In fact, I love to meet new people. To be completely honest, I stopped going because the way CCC does ministry is totally not my style. I can't just get into somebody's face and start telling them about Jesus and how He wants to change them. It's so obnoxious, so intrusive, so... impersonal. Jesus never did ministry like that. He always took the time to listen to people, to eat with them - which in those days were a big deal. Imagine having dinner with royalty, that's how it was. People were so ashamed that Jesus, the coolest guy on earth, wanted to sit at the same table with them. But I digress.

I think that if Jesus came here today, we'd have the same scene of him clearing the temple all pissed off. We've been doing it all wrong. No amount of organizing or programming can compare to the love of God. It's not up to us to save souls, Only God's mercy alone can do that. All that God commands us to do is to love one another, and that doesn't take a whole lot of effort when you realize that you're not responsible for the salvation of others. Indeed, tonight has only reaffirmed what I've been feeling deep down inside my heart, thinking in the back of my head, and helped me to form my own type of ministry. One that's based on relationships. A friendship goes deeper than any retarded tract, novel, movie, or magazine. I've seen it on all the faces that I have met.

It is my prayer that I will be a blessing to those around me and to everyone I meet. This will only serve as the catalyst to something greater, something new.

"To penguins." -Tony, the beat poet, as he raised his glass.

Starring: Me

I know I haven't posted in a while. It's not that I've been too busy, I just had nothing to say. It seems as though there's been a rash of unoriginality in the blogosphere lately. All this "tag you're it, fill out this survey" crap. I haven't been tagged. Am I bitter? No, that's what I get for leaving Xanga... Thank God. So instead of continuing the unoriginality, I'm going to steal somebody else's idea (huh?).

I always imagined my life as a movie. Writer, producer, director, main character. Have you ever wondered what the soundtrack to your life would be? Here's mine:

Opening Credits: Seishun Kyousoukyoku - Sambomaster
Waking, getting ready for the day Scene: Chocolate - Snow Patrol
Walking to School Scene: Cold Hard B**** - Jet
Walking Home Scene: Come Away With Me - Norah Jones
Summer moments scene: Take Me Out - Franz Ferdinand
Party/BBQ/Hanging out with friends scene: Life is Life - Opus
Driving Scene: Somebody Told Me - The Killers
Moments of Joy with Significant Other (like in There's Something About Mary) Scene: Just What I Needed - The Cars
Break Up Scene: The Scientist - Coldplay
Depressed Scene: Life - Our Lady Peace
Month Later after Break Up Scene: The Ex - Billy Talent
Training/Running until my lungs explode Scene: Last Train Home - Lost Prophets
Motivational/Rugby/Ultimate Frisbee scene: Artist in the Ambulance - Thrice; Song 2 - Blur
End of Summer after winning the Ultimate Frisbee Championship Scene: Your Hand In Mine (with strings) - Explosions in the Sky
Fight Scene: Dive For You - Boom Boom Satellites
Death/Funeral Scene: Grief and Sorrow - Naruto OST
Goodbye Scene: Fix You - Coldplay
Don't Dream it's Over - Sixpence None the Richer
Closing Credits: A Little Help from my Friends - Joe Cocker; The Impression That I Get - Mighty Mighty Bosstones

I've had too much time to think about this. Now I tag...

Nobody.

Feel free to tag me with your survey stuff, and I'll feel free to not comply.

;p

Would you like a copy of my soundtrack? I can send you one. I can and will. Just gimme a shout, email, call, comment, tag on the tagboard, instant message, singing telegram, can & string transmission, or kick to the face, and I'll make the necessary arrangements. This isn't limited to Winnipeg folk. If you live out of the city, I'd be more than happy to mail it to you. No need to pay postage.

NO DISTANCE IS TOO GREAT.

I've done it before and I'll do it again. I know you all want one.
*cough* Janet who visits like twice a day, but never comments or tags or anything. *cough*

But seriously, if they really did make a movie about my life. I would hope that they would show the way God's love has changed me. Because everything good in my life is because of Him. I can't take credit for any of it. In the whole grand scheme of things, this movie was never about me, it's about His love for me and how much it has affected those around me. Everything likeable about me is from Him. Thanks God. *high fives God*

Next week (or sooner... most likely later): List of movies I want to see.

Bored At Work: Take 2

So... I bet you're all wondering what a coconut does when he's bored at work. Well I'll tell you: He writes Haikus!

Haiku 1

Her smile still haunts me
A yearning to turn back time
To relive that day.

Wish I could forget
Memories can't be erased
Burns will heal, one day.

I want to ask why
But I won't get an answer
Yelling at the wind.

I can do better
The sea's filled with many fish
She's one of many.

My future looks bright
I said I wouldn't settle
But for her, I would.

Haiku 2

Reunion attempt
Have broken years of silence
Had nothing to lose.

She makes no effort
My resolve remains the same
To love her, always.

Any ideas for titles?
Bonus question: What is the underlying theme of this post? Marks will be given based on originality and content.

A Tale of Redemption

When I was younger, I used to be enthralled by this Playstation game entitled Valkyrie Profile. Its premise is based loosely on Norse mythology. The story goes that there's a war going on in Valhalla, a spiritual realm above earth. Odin, the head honcho of the good side realizes that his forces aren't strong enough, so he calls for the aid of Valkyrie, a winged warrior. He tells Valkyrie to recruit more soldiers from the mortal realm to strengthen Odin's forces. So, Valkyrie is charged with the daunting task of choosing worthy souls to be trained and, once ready, to fight for Odin. There is quite a degree of spirituality in this game, which is why I'm bringing this up. What made this game so engaging and kept me playing for hours on end was the way Valkyrie chose her army. The only way she could claim a soul was once the person died - not by her doing of course, but by usually tragic means. She always chose the outcast, who died alone, or a lone warrior who was betrayed by his friends, or an orphan who lost her way. In each case, it seemed like the souls that she deemed worthy, were the ones that needed a second chance. And that's exactly what she gave them. I could relate very well to the tales of tragedy, misfortune, and ultimately grace.

Now, even more so today, I realize how badly in need I am of a second chance. I don't want to settle for a comfortable life. I don't want to settle for second best. I want passion, and renewed commitment in my life. Earlier this week I met a man from Rwanda. He survived the genocide and only a few members of his family remain. He said that the whole experience only served to strengthen his faith. It seems that we in North America have such shallow faith. One that's based on convenience. Personally, I feel that my faith has become numb, that I'm just going through the motions. I miss that passion that I used to have. I miss genuinely caring about the well-being of others. I miss hearing His voice.

Dad, would you grant me a second chance?

Thomas: On surviving university.

I remember it like it was yesterday. My first year of University. I carpooled with an old high school friend, Thomas, that year. Though we both graduated the same year, he was finishing his final year towards his computer science degree, and I was just starting mine (I had taken a long break after high school). Every morning, I'd sit in his car and listen to his crappy music. It was either that or talk radio. During the lulls in traffic, he'd turn to me and offer me advice and pointers about all the little facets that the campus had to offer. He'd tell me about all the nooks and crannies and best kept secrets like which lounge was the quietest and had the softest couches for sleeping, or the quickest route possible from building A to building B. Now that I think about it, I probably wouldn't have lasted very long if it wasn't for his guidance. I should remind myself to thank him one day.

We were walking from the parking lot towards our respective classes. All of a sudden, Thomas tugs on my sleeve.

"Neil."

"Huh."

"This building..."

"What about it?"

"Duff Roblin."

"Yes?"

"They have the cleanest bathrooms."

I paused. "Okay..."

"If you ever need to go, top floor, Duff Roblin."

"Uhh thanks, Thomas." I shook my head.

"What do they study in that building anyway?"

Thomas shrugged.

Fast forward to today. I'm climbing the steps of Duff Roblin...

"Thomas sat here." I thought to myself as I stared down at a shiny porcelain bowl. I sat.

5 minutes later...
I was in awe of how quiet it was up here. Just then, another gentleman walked in to use the urinal. I could see his feet peeking from under the barrier. Do you ever just freeze and try to make as little noise as possible when somebody walks in and you're on the throne in a public washroom? The gentleman concluded his business, zipped up and moved away from my stall. His footsteps grew fainter. I heard the door swing open and shut abruptly. Silence... That bastard didn't wash his hands!!! I let it slide this time since we were in the pristine, spotless bathroom of Duff Roblin's top floor. Nostalgia swept over me as I reminisced over what seemingly was a pointless conversation was actually a grave matter of hygiene.

In the bible, Thomas was the one who doubted. Not my Thomas, he was wise.

It's been 3 years since that conversation. I still have no idea what they do in Duff Roblin.

*Disclaimer: One should always wash their hands after using a public bathroom.

Truth and Reconciliation

School starts tomorrow...

There are certain individuals within my sphere of influence whom I've lost touch with. I see them every now and then... And they seem distant. Not from this world, but from God. I've made a resolution to go back for them. To reunite them with the Creator. Please pray for me as I find them in the darkness.

Leave No Man Behind.

I realized that there aren't enough honest people in this world. And I don't mean those who go back to the cashier to return the change that was misgiven to them. I mean the kind that would tell me that there's parsley stuck between my teeth. Or would whisper in my ear to go brush my teeth. Or more importantly, tell me when I've wronged them instead of keep it to themselves and let it fester inside of them. I admire brutal honesty in people. Why is it better to "spare each other's feelings"? How is that even possible if the person hasn't been given the privilege of knowing in order to feel anything?

I want the truth.

You can't handle the truth.

Seems like this new school year will be a lonely one...

But then again, I don't mind.

We are teh winz!!!

We are the Champions
Originally uploaded by Niaru.

A beautiful cap to an awesome summer. For me, it was a bit dramatic. This summer started off with a couple disappointments and was starting to look pretty bleak. But I just shrugged it off and decided to make the best of it. For that, I'm grateful especially for my team who showed me how true spirit can overcome conflict between each other and within ourselves. The answer isn't 'out there', it's within us. Only by coming together, forsaking ourselves, could we have achieved such a great community of friends from different walks of life. Of course, there have been confrontations, but they were all with the intent of wanting to improve. I'm thankful to God for keeping me free from injury and blessing me with such beautiful friends. He has always been faithful to me despite my lack thereof. Every weekend has been filled with something crazy... I've been to church about 3 times this summer and have barely spoken to Him. But I know the way He feels about me and how He sees me hasn't changed. I'm His son.

Indeed, the 30 foot machine will be a force to be reckoned with next year. Winners of 'D' division baby. BEST OF THE WORST!!!

WHAT!

Goofy Boys
Originally uploaded by rodeworks.

How long has it been? I've been busy. But no news is good news in this case. I've felt A LOT like this guy many times this summer. So many things have been happening lately, that I don't know where to start. SO, instead of me writing an essay to put you to sleep, I'll just refer you to my photo site. Pictures tell stories in themselves. The link is on the side as well. I update it every couple weeks usually. Though I don't know how much I'll be uploading once school starts but we'll see, we'll see.

I'm thankful for my ultimate frisbee team. This summer would have sucked had I not met them. We're all a bunch of goofs just like the boys in the above picture. I love them. Until next time...

WAR OUT MENG!

I miss school. Scary, I know.

Wrote this at work (click to enlarge)...

One day... My room WILL be clean. ;p

Evidence

Extravagant. adj

1. Given to lavish or imprudent expenditure;
2. Exceeding reasonable bounds, excessive, unrestrained;
3. Extremely abundant, profuse;
4. Unreasonably high, exorbitant;
5. Straying beyond limits or bounds.

Lately and often, this phrase has been permeating my mind: "Love extravagantly." I hadn't the faintest clue why until I came upon this verse:

"Observe how Christ loved us. His love was not cautious, but extravagant. He didn't love in order to get something from us but to give everything of himself to us. Love like that."
-Ephesians 5:2

Too often, I've felt that I needed compensation for loving somebody. I expected too much. To love extravagantly means to love intentionally and deeply. But we can't. At least... not in the state we're in. Only upon realizing how much God loves us - deeply and immeasurably can we in turn love others the same way.

Hermit Mode: Disengaged.

Room's still a mess, bathroom's still filthy. BUT, I don't feel like shit anymore. Dunno what happened, nor can I try to explain. This earthly body seems to yearn for constancy and the only way it can possibly achieve it is by going through a swing of hills and valleys. I know He listens to me, even though He never answers me directly, I know He smiles on me, especially during the dark times of my life when I search for answers and find none, and yet... continue to press forward. Gonna go to my buddy's cabin for the weekend. Catch some rays (as if I need anymore ;p), toss some disc, enjoy the water. Life is both dreadful and beautiful. Much love, London.

Pictures will be up next week. OH, and whoever left those bible verses in my comments on my last post and didn't leave their name... HOW DARE YOU! And thanks. =D

Live your life.